a promise i cant keep

I promised myself I wouldn't write about temporary people, especially those I know will only be a fleeting presence in my life. But it's a promise I've never been able to keep. So here I am, wide awake at 4 am, putting my thoughts to words about you. I've been trying to distract myself from this, but every time I see you, I can't help but feel a deep longing. I want to know you better, open up to you, and have you in my life in some way. I'm well aware we've been through this countless times before.

I can't deceive myself by claiming there's no one else like you out there. In all honesty, I'm sure there are many who share your way of thinking, speaking, and responding. But after each encounter with you, I can't help but want you all over again. This feeling has persisted since the first time we met, even when we were both seeing other people. I doubt I'll ever get to express this to you directly, but at least I can share it here.

You strike me as someone with whom I could spend hours conversing, or simply listening to your thoughts and stories. Your perspective on the world, your insights into how it should work, your tales from 10th grade, and your nuggets of life advice, despite your youth, all captivate me. I'm not typically drawn to younger individuals, but there's something about you that's different. I can't say for certain what it would be like if we were together, but I'm willing to give it a try.

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