longing a life i cant remember

I ache for things I have no memory of, perhaps memories from a life lived elsewhere. Like gathering with a circle of friends in my late twenties, those who meet every few months, who remind me of life's simple joys and the truth that we never truly outgrow one another. I yearn for a work-life so balanced it doesn't crush my spirit, where choosing between mental health and the world outside isn’t a daily struggle. I dream of stepping out my door with purpose, with the quiet thrill of wanting to be somewhere. Instead, I’m left with vague memories that feel borrowed from another lifetime, while in this one, I stand alone, surrounded by the absence of what I crave.